If your closets aren’t stuffed full and you don’t have loads of things on your shelves then you may wonder how other people can live with so much clutter. But if you are one those people with clutter, I think you’ll recognize yourself in some of what I’m going to reveal.
This is like being in an AA meeting, only it’s clutter anonymous and I’m risking being vulnerable and acknowledging publicly that I’ve struggled with clutter. I love things. I feel comforted by things. Things make me feel safe.
Things are more than things to use … they hold memories, dreams, desires, fantasies, nostalgia, protection … the ‘what if’s’ when you struggle with getting rid of something … what if I’ll need it later, what if I can never get it again, what if it’s a diamond in the rough … that type of thing.
When my husband mishandles or irresponsibly breaks one of my things I become enraged … it’s like he’s disrespecting ME or disregarding ME … but my husband isn’t attached to things, he’s practical … things have a use and a purpose and if they are just sitting around then there is no purpose for them to be there. Sometimes that backfires on him and he wishes he had something he’s mislaid or discarded but he seems to live through it just fine.
On the other hand, I have a sense of “responsibility” to the “stuff.” I don’t know if anyone else feels that way? But I feel things need to be cared for and loved and that each ‘thing’ needs to be especially appreciated and particularly placed if the decision is finally reached to get rid of it. It’s exhausting, time-consuming, and energy draining to feel that much weight of responsibility to the things. But to not be concerned brings on intense feelings of betrayal, anger, guilt, and more.
There is so much draining energy in clutter.
I have been a size 4 to a size 24 and because of the emotional clearing work I’ve been doing, I finally feel free of the attachment of ‘things’ … they just don’t have the hold over me like they did in the past. I came to the point where I decided to get rid of all the sizes that don’t fit me right now. It’s hard to explain, but my heart didn’t feel that dreaded squeeze when I went through my fall and winter closet and groaned at the amount of clothes.
I picked one section of the closet, took all the hangers down and made decisions. Fits, doesn’t fit. Me, not me. In style, out of style. I kept a handful of things that didn’t fit but that I wasn’t ready to part with … a pair of brown suede jeans that I had custom made in England when I was visiting my brother there and that are a size too small but that I will gladly wear again if I do lose some weight.
The photo above doesn’t even come near to what I’ve given away the past week … 8 bags of clothes, 24 suits and coats on hangers … and many costly classic designer items that didn’t fit anymore. When I gave them away I was tapping using the emotional freedom technique and saying inside, “I accept who I am and the size I am right now. I trust I will enjoy getting new treasures if my size changes in the future. I am OK and will survive if I have only one shirt and one pair of pants that fit. I actually need very little to be happy, my happiness comes more from my relationships and family and animals than from ‘things'” … and so on.
Anyway, I just wanted to put this out there in case you struggle with clutter. You aren’t alone in feeling these types of struggles, it is energy consuming. You can work on healing this area, bringing in more space in your life, there are things that really do work to get to the core of clutter but each person is different and needs to do the work in their own time. I had to tap on different things that came up like sadness over not achieving the weight loss I’d been trying for, fear over making a bad decision or making a decision I would later regret or making a decision that would cost me more money down the road, and loss of a dream.
I had one outfit, an off-white beaded designer suede jacket and butter soft leather off-white skirt ($1500/ size 6), that I purchased after being inspired by a speaker wearing something similar at a horse seminar … I admired her confidence and class very much and this outfit was a way of copying her success … did getting rid of this outfit mean I was giving up aiming for speaking at horse seminars or giving up on success? I had to sort through all of that with each piece of clothing, some more than others. I know it’s not easy, that for people like me, there are emotional attachments that need to be worked through.
Working through the “clutter” energy impacts so many areas … relationships, fatigue, and even finances … more than once I’ve bought a piece of clothing that I actually already had but forgot about because it was buried in too full of a closet. If you feel like the time is now and you’d like some help, I’d be happy guide you through the process and share some of the same techniques that helped me release the attachments and work through the emotional baggage. It’s worth it! The cleaned up spaciousness allows new energy to flow in and not only looks really great, it feels amazing!