Blog posts are supposed to be uplifting, informative … but this one is going to be brutally honest. The only way to slay a demon is to bring it into the light, right?
Not with pain. Not with depression. Not with anxiety. Not even with stress.
No, I’m struggling with excess. And that’s a shameful topic.
I’ve been over-rewarding myself. I’ve been buying more clothes than I need. I’ve been over-enjoying food. The results are I’m carrying more weight than is healthy for me and I’m not putting away the amount of money I want to save for retirement.
I see what’s happening and I have trouble stopping it. Eating and having new clothes makes me happy, at least for a while.
I’m working on looking inside to find the deeper “whys” … am I sad over my parents rapid decline as they age. Yes. Am I glad I’m helping them out and sacrificing time to take care of them. Yes. Is that why I need a reward? Is that why I need an emotional boost?
Maybe. I’m just not sure. I don’t have answers. At least not yet. I don’t have anything uplifting or informative to share as to how to overcome this struggle. I’m just being honest that I am struggling and I haven’t worked it out.
Please don’t judge me. But I guess that’s the risk when you choose to be vulnerable and transparent.
If you’re struggling with something, I just want to say “I get it.” And although I’m not a hugger in the traditional touchy feely sense, I am deeply in tune with you and openly, willingly, and gladly am sending you a virtual hug as well as prayers for the strength you need, whatever that might be for.
We’re human, we struggle. I’m not alone in this. You’re not alone either. Maybe a little light will help. I’ve opened the door to let some in, and that takes courage. And it seems like courage and a little TLC will perhaps make the struggle a little bit easier to overcome.