Outliving a Dream

A Facebook memory came up and I can’t believe it’s been a year since I finished the Brown Pony Series. The first book was published the end of 2013 and the last in the spring of 2016. Writing was not only cathartic, I felt I had a duty to share what I knew before I left the field of hippotherapy. The books have been selling well on Amazon … there are sales all over the world … England, Ireland, Europe, Japan, South Africa, and of course America. I only make a dollar or two on each book sale but each month I get about a hundred dollars in royalties. I’m happy others are finding the information helpful and I’m honored by the kind comments I’ve received. (You can see the books at www.BrownPonySeries.com).

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In 2016 I gave all my hippotherapy equipment away to a new graduate in Occupational Therapy and now I’m cleaning out the barn and selling extra horse equipment on eBay. It’s time to move on and follow a new dream. The only problem is, I’m not sure what that new dream is?

After specializing in hippotherapy for 20 years, it’s been hard to find a new path, to decide on who and what my professional business focus should be … I was one of the first clinical specialists in hippotherapy in the USA, taught hippotherapy at a University, spoke at most all the National Hippotherapy Conferences, published hippotherapy research nationally and internationally, mentored undergrad Master’s level and Doctoral level college students … how do you top that? You don’t, in fact I won’t even try!

Actually, I never had ambitions to do any of the things listed above (including the writing of the Brown Pony Series), they were simply opportunities that presented themselves as I walked the path of my dreams, the dream to share hippotherapy with others. I still can’t believe all the professional blessings that I’ve experienced, especially with those people I’ve worked with over the years. Looking back, I went with the flow of life and stepped up when I saw a need … well that’s somewhat true … what happened first is that I waited for others to fill the need, I procrastinated, I initially said “no,”, and when I finally said yes, I was filled with anxiety that I wasn’t good enough. That’s the truth of what led to a multitude of accomplishments that I probably never deserved but which occurred anyway. In spite of myself, the dream pushed me forward.

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I’ve outlived the dream of hippotherapy, but I still don’t have a perfect grasp on a new dream … right now it’s about healing and relaxing. Following the hippotherapy dream did not come without a cost, I gave so much of myself that I have had to work on overcoming chronic pain for the past four years from a type of overuse syndrome. However I’m feeling stronger, I feel the healing slowly strengthening my body and mind. And I’m getting that feeling of restlessness to start new ventures … I wonder what the next few years will bring?

I know the path to a new dream will appear in front of me as I keep walking towards those things that excite me, offering the talents I have been gifted with to others … it will be something combining women, transitions, chronic pain, natural healing, stress management, wellness, horses, energy medicine and holistic health. But how, in what combination, and where is unknown to me. If you have any good ideas, let me know, I’m open to expanding my vision on how this will manifest.

Have you outlived any of your dreams? What have you done to move forward in life? Was it successful? What would you recommend to others who are in the process of moving on? How did you keep from getting stuck in the past? How did you take care of yourself during the transition? What other questions should I be addressing?

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