I could feel it, the disconnection, swirling of thoughts and type of creativity that keeps me stuck in my head and not in my body. I just finished presenting a totally new and innovative self-discovery stress management course on releasing body fear. For every minute of my talk, no one but me knew that I had spent an hour in research and course development – the planned 60-minute presentation had taken over 60 hours of creative thinking and intuitive searching.
The actual presentation ended up taking about 45 minutes – because of nervous excitement, I talked fast. I was pleased with the information people took away to use in their lives. But now I felt spent, exhausted and in need of recharging my “batteries”.
So back to ground zero I went. Literally, I went back to the ground – mother earth and began weeding – getting dirt under my fingernails. My garden filled with beautiful chaos. I am not the type of person to have neatly organized squares of flower beds. Rather I have winding paths filled on each side with overflowing textures and colors of flowers, fruit trees, shrubs and vegetables.
Slowly, I see progress. I’m ok with just a little area of progress. Here and there. No judgement. It’s my garden and I’m fine with it being my place of play and relaxation. I’m slowly recharging, I can feel the tension in my brow ease and a smile of awe cross my face as I look at an intricately shaped flower. I can breath deep now. And I think I’m ready now for the next work step – the creativity of thoughts are beginning to bud through again, so off to the computer I go…